2 Corinthians 12:9-10 – But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. (…) For when I am weak, then I am strong.
I felt deep down that it was time to start writing again. I’ve been so caught up in other things that I kept forgetting to update you guys.
I struggled to come up with ideas on what to write about. I thought I needed some amazing topic and didn’t feel like I had it in me.
But then, as I took some time to rest, I felt God urging me to share my struggles. The things I’ve been going through and how hard it’s been for me to navigate them.
Throughout my life, I’ve always battled with feeling inferior and not good enough. I constantly felt like everyone else had it all together while I was just “not enough”.
I faced bullying when I was growing up, and always felt judged and criticised. Whether it was about being “dumb”, “incapable”, “fat”, “skinny”, “ugly”, or even “beautiful”, there was always something someone had to say.
As a teenager and young woman, before I knew Christ, I held onto those thoughts and criticisms. They became my identity, and I believed what others said about me. Those opinions had such a huge impact on me. They dictated how my day went and even influenced how I lived my life.
I became my own worst critic. I’d look in the mirror and only see flaws. I’d tell myself lies and dislike every little thing about myself.
I turned to perfectionism. It’s funny, right? Sometimes we meet people who have weird reactions, maybe they seem overly confident and proud, but deep down, they might be struggling with something. Maybe they’re compensating for past hurts or trying to fill a void within them. We never truly know what people are going through.
I also set unrealistic expectations for myself. I wanted to be the best I could be and became my own biggest competitor.
By the grace of God, I came to know Christ and His love filled my heart. That changed everything. I discovered my true identity as a beloved daughter of God, perfectly created in every detail.
So, where am I going with all of this? Honestly, even I’m trying to make sense of what I’m writing because there’s so much in my heart.
When you choose to live for God, He is faithful to take away all your idols. And the way He does it is incredible. He’s both wise and gentle. God has been revealing the wounds in my heart and showing me that to live for Him and His Kingdom, I need to acknowledge and allow Him to heal me.
Sometimes God frees us instantly. I’ve experienced that in many other areas of my life. But with self-rejection, I’m experiencing His daily transforming power. I’m choosing to change the way I think and see myself every day. I’m choosing to deny myself and reject these thoughts that bring me down and sometimes even paralyze me from doing what God has called me to do.
Throughout this journey and in my experience, I’ve realised that dealing with self-rejection starts with acknowledging it, turning to God, and understanding who we are in Him.
I’m not saying that I’m learning to “like myself” or training myself to think that “I’m enough” like we are told to in the world. That’s not the way! Instead, learning to accept and love yourself the way God wants you to requires actively choosing to see God’s design in you, knowing the truth He speaks about you, and embracing every detail and feature He has created and brought into your life.
If the God who created the entire universe made YOU, loves YOU, and accepts YOU, how can you not? Understand that every single detail about you was intricately crafted by Him with love and wisdom. Even your DNA is unique.
There is truly only one YOU, and through YOU, God expresses Himself and continues to create miracles.
God created YOU just the way that YOU are. You were made in His image and unique that through YOU and only YOU, God may express Himself through that which He has created and still desires to create in YOU.
To sum it up, my message is to inspire and encourage you to be gentle with yourself, discover who you truly are in Christ, and confront your past with the transformative healing power that God offers. By doing so, you will not only experience His strength in your moments of weakness but also be able to offer comfort and support to others with the comfort you have received from Him.
SIDE THOUGHT:
Just because someone seems to have their life all figured out doesn’t give us the right to make certain comments or voice our opinions. We never really know what they might be dealing with deep within.
The words we say about ourselves and others can leave a mark and cause wounds that hold us and others back.
